Thursday, July 15, 2004

Deep Thoughts, pt. 1 (Lime Disease)

My friend Mark is a pusher. He has me hooked on Lime Tostitos. At first, I only indulged in them at Mark's house, in social situations. (I reasoned that this didn't alter my status as a healthy foods person, one who shuns the "snacks/soda" aisle at the grocery store.) Then yesterday, in a fit of deadline-induced madness, I sank a little lower into addiction. I started downing Lime Tostitos in the middle of the day. Alone.

Lime Tostitos are not ordinary corn chips. No sir. They are corn chips sprinkled with unnatural, dark green specks — specks that would prompt any sane person to assess the bag as rotten and toss it away.

That didn't stop me from opening a bag — the first such bag I'd ever purchased for myself — in the parking lot of the grocery store. I ripped happily into the clear cellophane, eager for the salty-limey fix. The bag split and exhaled a chilly breath, perhaps made more noticeable in the humid space of my automobile. Gingerly, I reached a hand to the chips. They, too, were chilled. Not moist, at all. But definitely cool to the touch.

Is this chilly blast normal for bags of chips today? That can't be entirely natural, can it? Is the process chemical? Harmful? And, if so, what is the antidote for someone who has already eaten about a half bag of tainted chips?

4 Comments:

At 2:27 PM, Blogger Mel said...

I think it's just the hyper-AC most stores have on. Those chips have spent their shelf life at 63 degrees.

Deadlines require snacks. Salty crunchy things sort of wake up your tongue and your brain.

But under real pressure, I resort to tea and those Carrs "whole wheat crackers" which are really COOKIES, on the philsophy that since I work on British literature, I should eat British food to assist the process.

So hopefully you are working on something kind of zippy, and the Lime chips fit in well with your topic...

 
At 3:03 PM, Blogger Benedict said...

At the risk of making you angry, I feel bound to point out that you are once again demonstrating impulsive food consumption. First it was Chipotle, now Lime Tostitos, but the impulse is the same.

 
At 6:40 PM, Blogger YelloCello said...

Sorry, Benedict, but I have to agree with Mel. Deadlines do require snacks. And I like the idea of matching those snacks to one's subject matter. (I used to try to do the same with music and whatever I was writing about.) These days, I write a lot about criminals. A zippy lime snack sure beats the alternative, which is hard to imagine. (Prison gruel? Cakes with files baked inside?)

Meanwhile, I'm relieved that those icy chips may only have been the product of the AC. I had scanned the web, looking for some mention of new chip preservation techniques. It's not beyound the realm of possibility, especially if they're putting those advertisements on Pringles...

 
At 5:34 PM, Blogger Disease Index said...

You keep a nice blog. I just started one myself about Disease. If you know of anyone who could benefit from Disease information, then please refer them to my Diseaseinformation site. I'll return the favor by referring my friends to your site.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home